Forged by Fire: How to Build Unwavering Resiliency

“Calm seas never made a good sailor.” Franklin D Roosevelt

It is often said that the best way to learn your way around town, is to get lost, and then find your way. I understand with today’s technology, that this notion may seem irrelevant, but the idea behind it is timeless. I am also old enough to remember my mother pulling over and taking out a map to figure out the next turn we have to take. Technology by nature is designed to make our lives easier, and if our ancestors were around to see the development of supermarkets and smartphones, they would be scoffing about how good we have it. Ease and peace of mind are all good and well, but it through the hardships, trials, and tribulations of life that we learn the most about the world, and ourselves.

For the sake of this post, we will break down life’s challenges into two main categories, those by choice and those by circumstance. It is important for our personal growth, that we constantly look for opportunities to challenge ourselves, to acquire new knowledge, new skills, not in the pursuit of perfection, but of consistent and positive progress. The path of least resistance may seem enticing, but it is a route that will rob you of opportunity, and shield you from the fires of life, that can forge a stronger, more resilient, and powerful you. I challenge you to welcome resistance, to embrace discomfort and the unknown in your life, and use such opportunities to see what you are really made of. That way, you are ready when life throws the unexpected in your direction.

In essence, you are preparing yourself for the hardships of life, and along the way, hopefully pursuing your interests, setting goals, and making the most of your short, fleeting time on this planet. The question I want you to ask yourself when tough times hit is, “What can I learn from this?” You may not want to go through a particular experience, but if you have to, you might as well try and take something away from it and use it to strengthen your position for the next time the storms arrive. If you look back on your life, you will probably see that you learned the most from your toughest teacher who raised the bar of expectations and asked you to reach for it. You will also see that you learned your most important lessons from your greatest failures and setbacks.

Public speaking has long been considered a universal fear for most people, and deservingly so. How is it that one would get more comfortable and capable with speaking in such an arena? You guessed it, by simply seeking opportunities to do it more, and embracing whatever comes of it. To develop an unwavering resiliency, you must be open to facing adversity with the attitude that you will succeed, no matter what comes your way. Just keep moving forwards, earning small wins and confidence along the way. Wars are won through smaller, key victories, and maintaining morale and urgency along the way. Your mindset is everything.

I used to coach golf and as much as the sport requires physical precision, it is much more of a mental game than anything else. If you set up over the ball, expecting to make a bad swing or slice it into the woods, you will very likely do that. Instead, I would encourage you to focus on your setup, trust your practice and your swing, pick your target and go. If you put a good swing on it, but catch a bad bounce, take the same attitude to your next shot, and you will find the green.

The most important thing I want you to take away from this post, is that you must always strive to keep moving forwards, no matter what you face. Life is tough, but you are tougher, and if you don’t believe that about yourself, than you haven’t had enough opportunities to prove it to yourself yet. I hope you enjoyed this post, and as always, take care, God bless, and be well.

Written By: Manwithaplan aka Jeffrey Kalinoski